omg my head blew up this morning

I'm pretty sure it's spelled "spoildmilk". Also, my alternate ego is Ergox from time to time

Age 27, Male

Lazy bum

ummm

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omg my head blew up this morning

Posted by spoildmilk - January 14th, 2010

- hey.
- hey? hey?! you just stole 20 bucks from my pocket and you say hey?!
- wha?
- you dumbass, give me my 20 bucks.
- go suck a dick.
- oh, so now your trying to piss me off, huh?
- you already smell like warm piss, dickweed.
- go take off your portable dick and suck your balls, k?
- just like you do?
- ok, now your just being stupid.
- yah.
- well, duh
______________________________________

- hey.
- hey. why are you in your underware this morning?
- well, this really cools off my legs. try it, it's amazing!
- ok, i will. (takes off his pants) you were right this is refreshing!
- haha, told ya! hey, let's go to that restorant overthere!
- sure.
[at the restorant]
- omg, a sheat covered table coool
- let's sit down.
- soft!
- AHHHHH!!!!! someone touched my legs.
- OMG, MINE TOO!!!
[a voice comz out off under the table]
- holy shit, you legz feel nice.... i could keep on scratching them forever....
- scratch near the ballz, ok?
- k. omg, you have thick balls made out of steel and wraped in iron!
- wtf?
- nothin.
- well then, keep scratching. uh... uuuuhh... that feels goooood.....
- i scratch good, yes? wait a minute... WAIT JUST A DARN MINUTE!!! OMG YOUR DICK IS MADE OUT OF PLASTIC!!!!!
- what?! no it isn't, and why did you squized it in the first place?!
- uhhhh.... no reason. oooh, you have soft skin around the ballz, do you wax it a lot?
- stop touching my.... special place!!!
- k. oooh, your asshole feels dry... haven't shit out any greasey poop, lately, huh?
- omg, you're a freak!
- whatever. hey, your legz are so smoooooth..... they've been polished!

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banner2 2010-01-14 14:12:55

hey spoiledmilk is your penis made out of plastic of somethin

spoildmilk 2010-01-14 14:12:55 (Updated 2010-01-14 14:13:38)

wtf lol :D

lotsofpain 2012-01-17 14:46:10

hey spoils wassup dawg hey hello hi, good day!

spoildmilk 2012-01-17 14:46:10

Yo dawg, what happened you were gone for a lil' bit, yo yo yo. Yeah, muthafucka.

lotsofpain 2012-01-17 14:47:22

you might have noticed my low-case letters. don worry bro, it's just to relax my fingers for these 100 comments, cos slaping that shift button is quite a pain, if i do say so myself.

spoildmilk 2012-01-17 14:47:22

oh god yeh man it feels so good not doing that anymore haha

lotsofpain 2012-01-17 14:47:58

ahhhh... fells good like i was taking a long leak after taking a massive shit...

spoildmilk 2012-01-17 14:47:58

and whiping it all of and thinking how that shit made your day

lotsofpain 2012-01-17 14:49:15

god dangit, i feel dirty though... and worried that someone will see my writings and judge me on my grammar.. :( sadface :(

spoildmilk 2012-01-17 14:49:15

nothing here but me and you...

forever alone... <;(

lotsofpain 2012-01-17 14:51:11

anyway, i've been really involved in girls lately. I have, what, like 4 girlfriends now? oh wait, one of them is your girlfriend, so i guess she doesn't count. but we are fucking, anyways.

spoildmilk 2012-01-17 14:51:11

yeah you are! her anme is Katie by the way i already told you that!

lotsofpain 2012-01-17 14:52:29

yeah, so one is her sister, the other is this hot chick i've met in this club, and the other is this sort of random-met hot chick.

spoildmilk 2012-01-17 14:52:29

oh great, lucky you mister casanova.

lotsofpain 2012-01-18 14:52:59

as i was saying (before I went to sleep for 20 hours, sorry), i have fucked them without none of them knowing about the other for... two months now.

spoildmilk 2012-01-18 14:52:59

you came back on the fucking same minute... LOL? MAGIC?

lotsofpain 2012-01-18 14:58:40

but enough talking about all that sexy stuff. i grew tired, so tired of it.

spoildmilk 2012-01-18 14:58:40

i'm so tired that i actually got interested...

lotsofpain 2012-01-19 14:02:29

oh wow you owe me a lot. i gave you... 700 comments! so now, you owe me 7 dollars.

spoildmilk 2012-01-19 14:02:29

that was our agreement.

lotsofpain 2012-01-19 14:04:24

but wait! the cost grows by 40% because i'm not spamming! i'm typing completely senseful comments! you have to admit that. so now its... 9.8 dollars i believe.

spoildmilk 2012-01-19 14:04:24

true that, true that. no worries, i can get that much money out of my back pocket.

lotsofpain 2012-01-19 14:06:30

BUT WAIT!!! the fact that i fucked your girlfriend the other day means you have to pay addition 60% to the last price. thrust me, you want your girlfriend fucked! it's the only way she becomes more fertile, and more fertility means more wild sex for you, and i've heard fertility helps thighs, boobs, asses grow...

spoildmilk 2012-01-19 14:06:30

hmmm... you do have a point. i really care about her daily dose of pheromones.

lotsofpain 2012-01-19 14:11:29

so now it's 15.7 dollars... oh wait! 120% because i fucked her with a condom on. you don't want a pregnant girlfriend, now do you? think logically here, good friend. 35.54... that's a bunch of money, if your poor, that is.

spoildmilk 2012-01-19 14:11:29

nope, no i don't! thanks! nah, i'm not poor, i cover that. i'll have to open up my wallet, though.

lotsofpain 2012-01-19 14:16:16

oh wow... an additional procentage of 50% has been added because i stroked her penises (the ones with the black smooth condoms) an made her cum. That's a big bonus to her fertility. so summed up, that's about 53.25 dollars...

spoildmilk 2012-01-19 14:16:16

yeah, she HAS been bitching about stroking those. i've been doing it 5 times a day! thanks for stroking her off, you saved me about half a day of rubbing.

lotsofpain 2012-01-19 14:19:13

IN ADDITION, i slapped her butt cheeks. that increases overall healthyness and boob growth. it also help the anus canal widen up and make less friction during long shits. a procentage growth of 80%... added up, now the price is 95.85! getting bigger by the minute, my friend.

spoildmilk 2012-01-19 14:19:13

nice! her cheeks needed a little slapping... but geez, i don't think i have that money in my wallet right now. no worries, i still have my piggy bank.

lotsofpain 2012-01-19 14:22:53

SUDDENLY, THE PRICE INCREASED BY 200%!!! because not only did i let her stroke my dick, but i let her suck it, AND swallow my semen. semen has a lot of nutrition value and keeps your girlfriend strong, healthy, and most importantly, enriches her fat recoures, which are stored mostly in her ass, boobs an thighs! wow, that's great for you and her! THE PRICE IS NOW 191.7!!! PAY UP!!!

spoildmilk 2012-01-19 14:22:53

oh yes, that's very good. she has been wanting to suck on something, and now i don't have to bu her that expensive dildo she wants. and her nutrition is always important, as well as making her sexyness grow, good job.

lotsofpain 2012-01-19 14:30:20

no, wait.. i forgot something... YEAH, I REMEMBER NOW! i also let you sleep with my sister the other night, remember? you had oral sex with her and everything. okay, so... 50% because she's hot as hell, 20% because you had vaginal sex, 20% for anal...
20% for mammary, 20% for oral... hmmm... 10% for spanking her butt... 10% for making her stroke your dick... 10% for playing with her titties, 20% for rubbing her condoms, 50% for blowjobing and handjobing... and ALSO, 100% BECAUSE you fucked her so much, her fertility is now fucking high and she keeps shaking her fat tits in my face and it's annoying.

spoildmilk 2012-01-19 14:30:20

ah, right. she came over and we did it after she wanted me to get wild in bed with her. oh well, gotta pay for her services.

lotsofpain 2012-01-19 14:36:16

so that's 824.3 dollars. But, since you just couldn't stay away from my family, you fucked my sister ten minutes ago and made my mom join the intercourse. so after you made both of them cum, your price grew 150%. so that's fucking 2060.76 fucking dollars.

spoildmilk 2012-01-19 14:36:16

aw yeah, that treesome was enjoyed by all. also, 2000 paper? that jizz doesn't grow on trees, chigga.

lotsofpain 2012-01-19 14:41:01

but nevermind that, you borrowed my "skanky girls" magazine, for your masturbation habits... but you never returned it! 5%, my friend, 5%. BOOYA, 2163.7!

spoildmilk 2012-01-19 14:41:01

aw, sorry. i really needed to cum.

lotsofpain 2012-01-19 14:43:44

also... IS THAT YOUR DOG FUCKING MY CAT? 10% PLUS!!! I'M NOT AMUSED BY THIS! spoilds, you're my friend and everything, but your FUCKING DOG is FUCKING my FUCKING CAT!!! What kind of hybrid will come out of this little "cuddle"?! 2380 DOLLARS!

spoildmilk 2012-01-19 14:43:44

fuck! sorry! he has been really aroused all week, humping everything... damn, i knew i should have gotten him castrated...

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